Genesis 32-33
Jacob is led home to reunite with his brother Esau and his father Issac. Jacob learns from his servants that Esau is coming out to meet him with 400 of his men - this causes great fear in Jacob (Gen 32:6-12). While Jacob goes to God in prayer he does not completely trust in God as he divides his group up and does not personally go out to meet Esau, sending instead his servants. Additionally, he sends gifts from among his herd as a way to pacify any anger Esau may have.
That night Jacob encounters God face to face as God wrestles with him.
But Jacob replied, "I will not let you go unless you bless me."
27 The man asked him, "What is your name?"
"Jacob," he answered.
28 Then the man said, "Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with men and have overcome."
29 Jacob said, "Please tell me your name."
But he replied, "Why do you ask my name?" Then he blessed him there.
30 So Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, "It is because I saw God face to face, and yet my life was spared."
31 The sun rose above him as he passed Peniel, and he was limping because of his hip. 32 Therefore to this day the Israelites do not eat the tendon attached to the socket of the hip, because the socket of Jacob's hip was touched near the tendon.
I often wrestle with God and this is a good thing. Yet this has not rid me of my tendencies to seek my own will and to lean on my own abilities vs God. As God touches Jacob's hip as a means to draw Jacob closer to God, I seek to more deeply understand how God has created and molded me to depend on God.
My Prayer: Help me understand and appreciate where you have both made me weak and how you have made me strong. Help me use my strengths to your glory and just as importantly help me understand and acknowledge my weaknesses so that my trust and dependence on you can grow.
